Reflection

Today I was asked what my 2007 goals were for our junior high ministry, I found myself honestly giving an un-articulated answer. So, I spent the rest of the day reflecting upon this. Here are few things that I have found to be true of myself:

1- I am too critical of people and often times of students as well. Today, I realized that perhaps I standards that are too high for some. And from this, need to be more intentional in how I interacted with students and foster a life of faith. I often systematically clump students into groups, instead of really understanding who they are as individuals.

2- I am still wet behind the ears when it comes to ministry. Being 26 and having a somewhat mature streak to my work ethic, I am still learning and am in no position to boast of what I have done or haven't done. God has blessed me with a tremendous opportunity at the church I'm currently at, and from this I am still learning "the ropes" and still need time to make mistakes (which seem to be often) and learn from them. Although MAG has given me a different dynamic in regards to youth ministry, it still hasn't completely prepared me for ministry. Only time and grace will be able foster a seasoned youth worker. Nevertheless, MAG has tried to prepare me the best way they can.

3- Sometimes what is missing is not the core of ministry, but within the core of myself. I have taken advantage of time, energy and resources to further pursue me own selfishness. When I could have been reading more scripture, I was playing more HALO. When I could have been comforting a hurting student, I was at the movies. When I should have been living out my faith in my own community, I was cutting corners by "trying" to produce a "thriving" junior high ministry.

Now, those who are reading are wondering what does this have to do with The Refinery? Before, I can have a vision for this ministry, I must first let God and His vision (for me) work in my life. So many times I have put up this wall of "everything's great" when deep inside...I'm rotting!